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CrusadersUnderwear

Why So Serious?
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Hey world wide web!  I'm here to talk about my personal problems!

I've finally gotten on some stable meds for my (and this is the real update) biopolar.

Yeah, I'm bipolar rather than chronic depressive.  This was news to me too.  It does sort of explain a lot though.

So I'm feeling better and I'm trying to get back to writing.  My parents are hounding me to get a job.  My shrink thinks this is a bad idea and wants some more time for me to recover and the meds to take affect before hurling myself full force into the job market.

I wish they'd all stop telling me what to do.  I'm 24.  I'll decide on my own anyway.

What I'd LIKE to do is get a writing job in a far-flung city somewhere, away from my parents and ultra talented/lucky brother.  What is GOING to happen is up in the air at this point.
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If you haven't heard about the issue by now, here it is: the Earth is cooling rather than warming.  Global Warming is, if not a hoax, close enough so you can't tell the difference.  And, of course, now that the truth (if this is, indeed, the truth) is out, everyone is trying to cover it up again.  And everyone involved is embarassed.

Why?

Really, what was the result of this?  Has anything, environmentally-wise anyway, happened that was truely bad?  Energy-saving appilances are now the norm in home-improvement and department stores.  Alternative and renewable fuels and vechiles are on the up and coming.  People are into reuseable grocery bags.  If anything, most normal people have SAVED money.

Now I'm not going to talk about those people responsible for this - they have undoubtedly lost money - probably millions of dollars, not to mention their reputations and their careers.  I don't know who they are exactly, nor do I care what their political affliations are.  Here is my message to them:

I BLAME you and I'm HURT that you lied, but I not ANGRY with you.  But you should man up (or woman up, as the case may be) and take responsiblity for this.  It was your fault.  You lied to us.  Now, I'm afraid, you have to face the music.  You should have done it ages ago.  Back when something could have been salvaged from all this.  But keep in mind, nothing bad actually happened.  A lot of good things happened actually.

I doubt this will be seen by anyone but a few people who read my blog.  I'm not out to change the world or tell the politicans what to do.  I can't take the world by the ears and give them the good shaking they so richly deserved right now.  But to the few people who read this blog will know that SOMEONE is going to be mature about this, even if that person has no global clout.
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Okay, so the plan has crashed and burned.  Not too sure what to do about it at this point.  I'm trying to study for the Graduate Record Exam (GRE) in hopes that some graduate program will accept me, though considering my current track record, I'm not holding my breath.  I'm not even holding my breath for a good GRE score, though I am trying to study.  I came to the realization that I have just spent the last year of my life going nowhere and generally striking out.  Sadly, I am not as upset about this as I should be, which means I'm going another round with depression, whether I like it or not.  To those of you who have depression, or know someone with it, that last sentence will probably make more sense than to those of you who are lucky enough not to suffer from it.

Thriller is back by popular demand (really, one person requested it to go back up again and I saw no reason why it shouldn't).  There is a half-written sequel in my computer's hard drive and hopefully with one day go up.
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NEW PLAN!

1 min read
I have a new idea to handle my writing discipline issues and my short story disability in one fell swoop. I'm gong to writing one short story everyday for a year, starting today. *dramatic sting*  This being said, I'm wiping everything from my computer and storing it in zipped folders on an external hard drive where it won't taunt me.  I'm also wiping my gallery in hopes of putting new and better things in it.  (Okay, new things.  I'm not really hoping for better.)  I figure by the end of November, I should have plenty to send to short story publishers, even with all of the stuff that gets weeded out as just plain terrible.
On to the stories!
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A place of confinement.  A cage.  A box inside a box.  A place where you are made to feel punishment.  A place, after having wide open spaces to roam, that is narrow, cramped, and miserable.  

That's the defintion of prison, right?

Then welcome to Washington State Community College Penitentiary.  After spending time and graduating from a place that catered to the top fourth percentile of intelligent students from all over the world, I'm now, due to my own fault, stuck here, which a group of people who aren't at the bottom of the barrel, they're below it.
I guess I just didn't try hard enough to find a job.  Maybe I didn't say the right things at the right time.  Maybe I should have made different choices.  Does it matter?
It's not that the people here are mean.  They're actually quite nice.  But the minute I start discussing philosophy or art or theatre or, heck, even grammatical corrections, their eyes glaze over and they look at me like I've done the academic equivalent of bending a steel bar with my bare hands.  There aren't a lot of clubs here.  People who go here have kids and job problems and marriages and only so much time in a day.  I miss fencing.  I miss role-playing.  I miss people I can talk to.
I have to have done something to diserve this.  I'm positive.
We put one of our cats down a couple weeks ago.  She was 14 and sick, but it was still hard.  One of the people from church died from causes related to swine flu.  Our church is being torn apart due to something relatively stupid (unrelated to swine flu)and nobody can understand why I don't care.  (It's because I no longer apply to the Christian philosophy.  I try not to mention this, because it's some form of sin.)
The swine flu has got everyone on edge.  Schools have been closed over it.  Not, unfortunately, the one I'm attending.
Yeah, not much else to say here.  Other than I'm unhappy and hate it and feel like whining about it.
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